Liveliness, madness, energy…..few words that I had stopped
associating with myself, ever since I quit Times Now. No, I am not going to
tell you a life changing experience which helped me escape from the clutches of
a mundane life throwing me into a world of high spiritedness… Yet it can be
described as a condition where one realizes the need to feel alive, to say in
the least
All the 4 years while I worked for a constantly buzzing news
channel, I kept postponing everything that I believed I enjoyed. Be it learning
a newer dance form or reading enough books, watching more films, learning a new
language or hanging out more with friends. Blame it on TIMES NOW and the crazy
schedule, I said in my head over and over again. ‘I don’t have the time after a 12 hour long working
day’ I reasoned to myself categorically. Yet I never once forgot to carry a
book in my hand bag. Despite a tiring day, I almost religiously cursed the
train for forcing me to alight at my station before I could finish reading that
gripping chapter.
At home it was a different challenge, snatching the remote
from my father who would put any film buff to shame. Or perhaps reaching home
to witness the joy of seeing the remote unguarded with my father blissfully snoozing,
while our demigods Mammooty and Mohanlal fought for his attention from across
the TV screens.
I admit I didn’t have time to dance, but the spirit of
Prabhu Deva’s brother from the video ‘Kya Soorat Hai’ made me do some crazy
moves on the road even if half of them were happening in my head. En route home,
I had a wonderful time imagining the scandalized expressions of the pedestrians
if I played out my dream of dancing in the middle of the road. I am also guilty
of adding my friends in annoying Whatsapp groups just to co-ordinate on post
work dinner plans. So much so that on one occasion we had three parallel groups
co-ordinating on three different dinner plans for the week with almost the same
set of people.(I hope Himani is reading)
And now I am supposedly in that
ideal situation which I fantasized for years, where I can do everything I want
to at my pace, at my leisure…. Deciding to pamper myself before the wedding, I
have quit my job, taking a month long break before I relocate to another city
and begin a full-fledged job hunt. But all I have done for the past few days is
sleep, eat & walk from the living room to my room depending on whether I
want to watch TV or access Facebook when I get tired of cursing Sajid Khan
after all music channels fire the intolerable Humshakals’ songs at me from all
directions.
Didn’t read a single book, didn’t
watch a single film that was on my list, wanted to learn Telugu, got myself a
CD (FYI I am moving to the Telugu land of Visakhapatnam), but even that’s lying
untouched. Even taking a train or riding my rocketi (my scooty) seemed like too
much trouble, so didn’t bother to get out of my bed and make plans with my
friends either.
In ‘How I met your mother’ style, I
faced an INTERVENTION, my fiancé indirectly sent across a message hinting that
I was acting wasted without smoking up. Well
well…That’s when I realized that being busy in fact kept me happy and not just useful.
There are so many activities you squeezed in so little time. On the contrary having
an abundance of time makes one delay things so much that you end up embracing
them ‘Never’
Lastly, I would like to add that
it were the wise words of my fiancé that inspired me to pen down this painfully
long post. This is just to let you know whose inbox to spam if you want to kill
yourself for stumbling across this particular blog. His email id shall be provided on request to
needy bloggers.
